abundance taken for granted

Sometimes I wake up and wonder, where am I now, and what am I doing here in Australia...

It has been around 3 months since I've left Malaysia, and looking back...

I remembered the time when I was so adamant on coming here and doing whatever it takes to bring me where I'm at now. Even if it meant not putting others before myself.

I guess I felt like I was constantly being controlled by my parents. Being like a bird in a cage, and wanting more than ever... FREEDOM.
That WAS my sole purpose of coming here initially.

But now as everything starts to take its toll...
Exams. Assignments. Environment. Food. Making decisions on my own.

I start missing home.

Yes, I can safely tell you that.

To add on to that, I've just missed my dad's 50th birthday. I heard it was a blast. He had 2 parties, one with friends and another with relatives.

I miss being able to witness the occasion. And the food. =p

Homecooked food, that's what I miss. And my parents just being there for me whenever and wherever I need them.

Sitting on daddy's lap.

I know I'm such a daddy's girl and I'm not getting any lighter.

Especially during times where I couldn't sleep... Even my annoying siblings, as a matter of fact.

I remember when they used to come in my room and disturb me. Now, I'm missing that. The laughter, the togetherness. To put plainly, my FAMILY.

I know I have taken all my blessings for granted and I'll appreciate them better.

Luv ya-Dad, mom, Pam & Darren. Muaxzz...

insomnia

I cry a lot.

To sleep.

Yep, you got me right. I've been having some sleepless nights. Not being able to sleep is not a good thing, if you didn't know. Tossing and turning about. Very tiring. Especially when you know you are just tired and are trying so very hard to sleep.

So... I cried myself to sleep.

Just because crying takes up a lot of energy (believe me, it does) and eventually I'll be able to fall asleep. At least that's what I'm hoping for...

And it doesn't help much that my room's SO near to the main road.
Zoom, goes a car. And tut-tut goes a train. Not to mention the drunkard, I've been telling you about.
It wouldn't be so bad if the noise was constant, I'll deal with it. But it goes dead pan silent every now and then, then... *noise*

Arghh!!!

So i start to dream of my bed at home (a queen size one, mind you), the comfy-est thing on earth and zzzz... *no noise*

Sob sob sob... Till I finally doze off to sleep...

A few hours before I would then have to wake up again.

All for love

Revenge is sweet. Indeed. So, which dead fella said that. I couldn't help but disagree.

So, the after effect may last a while. Yea, it's all good. But in the end, all you hurt is no one but yourself.

What happened to forgiveness? Jesus said to forgive a person 7 times 7. Not saying that you can only forgive a max of 49 times, but... for as many times as it takes. Because. Just because. Humans are NEVER perfect. They can try, but hey, that's as far as they can go.

Some may try to atone their sins by doing good deeds but after a while, it comes up to nothing. Others who would not care less, would continue, sadly, in their sin. After all, it seems, I've done so many, one more wouldn't hurt.

But have you heard of the cross? And that it was for us that Jesus died on that very cross for our sins? Not a pretty sight, if u were there 2000 years ago. So, it's all for LOVE.

Do you believe?

Jesus~My Rock

Just an extension to the previous...

So what if you find everyone changed except for you? Not to contradict with my previous post but... Have you thought about it? When you're all alone in this world of yours, what happens?

(sidetracking)
Just to put this into perspective... I heard a lunatic, more like a drunkard shouting in the wee hours of the morning. Don't ask me why I was awake. But it striked me. Why do people bother getting drunk sometimes?
To lose themselves? Because of loneliness? Everything has changed?
Now the bits and pieces of the jigsaw puzzle seems to fit and a picture is starting to take shape.

So...coming back to the question...
WHAT DO YOU DO?
That's why I have my God at my side. He NEVER changes. NEVER. EVER.

Jesus~
The Alpha and Omega
The Beginning and the End
The Same, Yesterday, TODAY and forevermore!!!

And that is why He is my Rock, my Fortress and my Salvation. For I can hold on to Him in every circumstances I go through.

Not a mirage. The SAME!!

Change inevitable?

Changing faces, changing people, changing situations.
Some say that being in a different surrounding changes you. You become like a chameleon, changing color.
It can be for the better or the worse.
Yes, you adapt better. But are you yourself anymore? What have you become?
Times like this you look into the mirror and you find...is that me I see?

So, people DO change. So, did I. Still YET to figure out if I am better today than before.

You be the judge ^^

Welcoming...

My first EVER post.

Well, not...really. The last time I didn't get around to keeping it alive.

So here I am. Starting over. Lots of things to be said, lots of things to be seen.
Well, ain't that what bloggies are for? People with so much time in their hands. Oh, lookie here.


I've just became one of them =="