abundance taken for granted

Sometimes I wake up and wonder, where am I now, and what am I doing here in Australia...

It has been around 3 months since I've left Malaysia, and looking back...

I remembered the time when I was so adamant on coming here and doing whatever it takes to bring me where I'm at now. Even if it meant not putting others before myself.

I guess I felt like I was constantly being controlled by my parents. Being like a bird in a cage, and wanting more than ever... FREEDOM.
That WAS my sole purpose of coming here initially.

But now as everything starts to take its toll...
Exams. Assignments. Environment. Food. Making decisions on my own.

I start missing home.

Yes, I can safely tell you that.

To add on to that, I've just missed my dad's 50th birthday. I heard it was a blast. He had 2 parties, one with friends and another with relatives.

I miss being able to witness the occasion. And the food. =p

Homecooked food, that's what I miss. And my parents just being there for me whenever and wherever I need them.

Sitting on daddy's lap.

I know I'm such a daddy's girl and I'm not getting any lighter.

Especially during times where I couldn't sleep... Even my annoying siblings, as a matter of fact.

I remember when they used to come in my room and disturb me. Now, I'm missing that. The laughter, the togetherness. To put plainly, my FAMILY.

I know I have taken all my blessings for granted and I'll appreciate them better.

Luv ya-Dad, mom, Pam & Darren. Muaxzz...

insomnia

I cry a lot.

To sleep.

Yep, you got me right. I've been having some sleepless nights. Not being able to sleep is not a good thing, if you didn't know. Tossing and turning about. Very tiring. Especially when you know you are just tired and are trying so very hard to sleep.

So... I cried myself to sleep.

Just because crying takes up a lot of energy (believe me, it does) and eventually I'll be able to fall asleep. At least that's what I'm hoping for...

And it doesn't help much that my room's SO near to the main road.
Zoom, goes a car. And tut-tut goes a train. Not to mention the drunkard, I've been telling you about.
It wouldn't be so bad if the noise was constant, I'll deal with it. But it goes dead pan silent every now and then, then... *noise*

Arghh!!!

So i start to dream of my bed at home (a queen size one, mind you), the comfy-est thing on earth and zzzz... *no noise*

Sob sob sob... Till I finally doze off to sleep...

A few hours before I would then have to wake up again.